the most wonderful time of the year.

I wanted to write this post previously but with the holidays comes a lack of free time to just sit, reflect and write. So though it is mid January and everyone has so quickly faded from the Christmas spirit, it is exactly that which I want to blog about. 

Christmastime is my absolute favorite. And why shouldn't it be?

BUT

I genuinely forget sometimes how blessed I am. That may sound silly so let me try and explain ... my life sort of just seems like the norm after a while. I begin to think that having two parents who love you is an experience everyone gets. Presents under the tree are no big deal to me anymore because they have always been there and well, why wouldn't they be? Everything that was supposed to happen in my life has. There has never been a day where I woke up feeling hungry or unloved. Never a day where I was worried about having enough clothes to keep me warm or a roof over my head to keep me dry. I have the pleasure each day over Christmas break to wake up and do as I please; overstuff myself full of holiday food, watch silly movies like Elf or Home Alone, and decorate the tree at my leisure.

Very rarely do I recognize how the Lord has blessed me on a regular basis. It seems odd that I forget to do that, especially when Christmas is the time that we are supposed to be celebrating Him most of all. During this time of year everyone loves a little bit more and a little bit deeper. However, we have the tendency to love the wrong things. We focus a tremendous amount of time and energy on gifts, parties, and each other when in reality Jesus needs to be the one we should be centering ourselves around. Don't get me wrong - I have never actually forgotten the true meaning of Christmas and of course I go to church on Christmas eve but I am not really sure if that stuff has as much of a lasting effect on me as it should. 

My Christmas was blessed beyond belief this year. Gifts were abundant and the love I received, not only from my family but also Tyler's, was flowing without a doubt. Getting to relax with friends and wrap presents each night continually brought a smile to my face. I have zero complaints. I just wish I had recognized how lucky I was in the moment that it was all happening and given thanks to the One that deserves it then rather than a month or so later. 

The New Year quickly approached after all the craziness of Christmas died down and I began to think about how I wanted to change my life in 2012. There is so much I want to do for myself and for others - I just don't even know where or how to start at times. I suppose the easiest way to keep up with everything is to write it all down and alas, that is what I am doing here. My goals may seem silly or unreachable but I am hoping to put forth as much of an effort as possible to make these things happen in my life in the following 354 days. 

Here goes nothing ...

- Gain faith and draw closer in my relationship with the Lord

- Cut sweets out of my diet

- Complete Insanity and keep up a workout regimen through the year

- Pursue teaching as my career and begin getting certified 

- Move out of my parents house 

- Find a way to get involved in a non-profit even if it just is through volunteering

- Maintain and grow old friendships while also starting new ones

- Continue to open my heart to the man I love and be a woman he is proud to love

None of it is going to be easy. We are already 11 days into 2012 and I feel everyday like I have failed at something or want to give up. But I haven't yet and that is the best I can do for now. It is a work in progress ... I am a work in progress. And I just hope at the end of the year I look back and am proud of what I managed to accomplish with my family, friends, boyfriend and most importantly the Lord by my side.