right ... perspective.

YES the title of this particular entry is a Harry Potter reference. Deathly Hallows Part 1 - spoken by Hermoine. I am a dweeb. Don't hate. 


Really though - perspective. I looked up the definition [mostly to make sure I knew what I was talking about] and I did, duh. It means according to dictionary.com the state of one's ideas, the facts known to one, etc., in having a meaningful interrelationship. 


Every now and then I go back and read previous blogs I wrote. I like to laugh at myself, re-live some memories and even at times cry for just how plain sad I sound. Tonight I came across a portion of a post that I just had to dig deeper into. On September 2 I posted this: "Wedding to go to this weekend. It'll be a fun time. Getting to see quite a few people that I do not get to spend enough time with. Hopefully it will help us all reconnect and stay in touch better. All in all should be pleasant." Little did I know that wedding would be a ground-breaking, earth-shattering, all around perfect night for me. 


I see how flippantly I talked about the events to come - I had no idea what the evening would bring of course but I wonder why we don't go through life attempting to see a bigger purpose in things. I never could have known I would lock eyes with the handsome guy at the top of the stairs and be swept off my feet but I went into the whole ordeal almost indifferent. What if I had chosen not to go? What if one of us had brought a date? What if I hadn't been looking his direction when he walked in? I wonder now if that would have been our only opportunity for a chance meeting or if fate would somehow have brought us together regardless of whether we attended the wedding that night. He wasn't even who I was referring to when I mentioned "people I do not get to spend enough time with" - to be honest I doubt either of us crossed one another's mines often ... if ever. 


I also came across this: "L: Love. So very cliche, I know. But alas here I am. I hate love. An oxymoron at its best. It is by far the most confusing, complicated, unfaltering, painful, exciting thing in the world. And yet it seems to constantly slip in and out of my fingers. All I want is to be happy again. To be in love, in a steady, seemingly normal, easy relationship and be happy. " Alas here I am in a steady, easy, normal relationship. And I am happier than I could ever imagined I would be. It took awhile but it came around. He has managed to make me not hate love and instead act like a giddy eleven year old with her first crush all the time. 


SO - perspective is something we don't always choose to use to our advantage. We hurt and rarely take the time to go back and see how good that hurt and pain can be for us. That is all I managed to do here. He made it all worth my while.